Never a dull moment out here. Friday evening I was planning to have a quiet, relaxing evening as Kent was gone with the band that night. Before I sat down I wanted to burn off the weeds that had grown in our fire pit so I could dig the ashes out of there. I had a large cardboard box that I set on top of the weeds and lit it on fire. Everything was burning nicely when I heard screams coming from the fire pit and saw a baby bunny’s head coming up through some of the charred area. I had to get him/her out of there so reached in and pulled him to safety but still heard crying. I ended up pulling 3 more baby rabbits out of the ash and fire. I felt terrible that I had destroyed their nest but had no idea they were in there. Fortunately their mother had dug fairly deeply or they certainly would have died. They had a couple of singed patches of fur but seemed okay otherwise but what to do with them. Beauty and Gadget the barn cats were already alerted by the crying and stalking around the area where I had laid the bunnies down. I knew they were too little to just let loose outside and I knew not to handle them too much.

I gathered them up and took them in the house, put them in a box with a heating pad and hit the internet to look for help. I knew they needed someone with experience to take care of them. Fortunately I found a link to an emergency vet clinic that said they helped with wildlife rehab. They in turn gave me the number of the Four Lakes Wildlife Rehab Center which was open until 9 p.m. I rushed the baby bunnies in to town and got them to the center before it closed. They applied ointment to their burns but felt the bunnies would be okay. Their eyes were open and they were jumping around when touched. Hopefully the little guys will do fine and end up released back into the wild. Next time I burn anything I’m going to do a thorough check for nests under the weeds or brush!

This post doesn’t have to do with people romance but rather the loss of our beloved animal companions. Since I own a lot of dogs I also have to deal with this loss more frequently than many pet owners do. Each time I have had a particularly hard loss it seems that a needy dog has appeared, perhaps sent by the other one from across the Rainbow Bridge.

Buster is one of those who I believe was sent for a reason. Buster is a pug that I meant to foster for the pug rescue and find him the right forever home. I was still grieving for my Lily (my first ever pug) even though it had been months since her death. Buster was rapidly dumped off at our home by his previous (and 3rd) owner and it was apparent the frequent switching of homes had left him with some baggage. Despite the baggage (upset/screaming if crated, separation anxiety, hanging on your legs when you tried to go through a door, etc.) he had redeeming qualities, too. He loved to play with my big dogs once he adjusted to them but wasn’t too interested in my other pugs. He was immediately retrieving balls and playing “tug” with toys. A dog like this needs a job, not to sit on someone’s lap and I think my husband expressed the thought first that we really should just keep him. The very first night we had Buster he was so distressed I decided to take him to bed with us and he snuggled up against me in the same spot Lily always did. I realized he had been sent by her to comfort me but I didn’t want to let myself love him. I took him to a couple of obedience classes and then I took him to an agility class. He took to it immediately although we had to work through the distractions of other dogs working and him wanting to just run off and do his own thing. We switched to a smaller class which helped a lot with his focus. At this point he is improving on being crated, we have gone to matches, done some agility demos and even been in a couple of trials now. He has his first agility title but we are still working on being a team.

Today we went to another agility match. He has trialed at this same place and often tries to run out of the ring so I was prepared to deal with that and give him positive reinforcement for coming back to me. Much to my surprise and delight not only did he run both courses fast and accurately but he never once tried to leave the ring. When we left the building after his second run I felt like I now had an agility teammate. I realized that loving Buster does not take away from the love I have for my Lily but it does help her loss not hurt so badly now.

As we got to the car I heard a sandhill crane in the distance. This is in town and I’ve not heard sandhills at that place before. Soon it was closer and it was then I felt my Lily’s presence. Ironically this week was the 4 year anniversary since she left me. I think she was telling me “I’m still watching over you, good job.”. I’m glad no one saw me crying out by the car.

If you are interested, these are two other blog posts about the messengers who my dogs have sent to me in the past.

Messengers From Beyond

Turbo Now Has Wings

I went to “Savvy Support Club” at the Horse First Farm last night. This is held once a month and a chance for people who work with their horses using Natural Horse Training methods to meet and share information. Last night there was a speaker, Anke Johnson, who was to speak on “Squashing Fear and Building Confidence”. The talk was not at all what I expected but I took a lot away from it. Anke is a life coach but as she said, she can’t motivate any of us to do anything, it has to come from within and what she does is help people find for themselves what motivates them.

Things We Fear

Anke had us draw a large circle then divide it into 8 pieces (like a pie) then label each piece on the outer circle with something that we fear.
She then had us rate each area with where we are from zero to 10 with zero being the worst. Examples for me on the circle were “fear of injury”, “fear of not being in shape” enough to ride better, “not enough time” to do what I need then what I want, “losing skills/forward progress” with my horse due to winter weather and not enough time , etc. She then pointed out how if you improve even one baby step in one area you will see progress in the other. Note that at least two of my pieces of the pie related to “not enough time”.

Then she asked people how much time they could give this week to make one small step in just one of those areas. She asked one person how long it would take to make one small step where she wanted to improve (riding bridleless at a canter was her goal). She said she needed 2 hours this week to work on it. Anke asked her if she could divide this time into 30 min. slots but she felt that 30 min. was not enough time to catch and groom her horse let alone ride him. Anke then asked her how she could make that easier. After thinking she said if one of the workers on the farm would leave her horse in his stall she would have saved time by not having to catch him. Anke then asked her when she would work on this goal and made her pick a day and time. She then asked her to have a support person that would help her achieve her goal and someone to hold her responsible for taking this time with her horse. She then is to e-mail or call that person and say “I did it”.

Finding Time

I started to relate this to my lack of time when she asked me if I had 5 min. three times per day to work on one of my goals. When I hesitated and said maybe 5 min. twice a day she said she could see that would be too big of a step for this week. She assigned me to take 5 minutes 3 times in the next week and by next Thursday I am to e-mail her and tell her that I did it. Neat system and although I can’t afford her classes or coaching I am definitely going to try to break things down in my life to smaller steps so they don’t look so impossible.

Anke also mentioned that often with time management issues it is procrastination or not prioritizing. I know my biggest issue is time management and it affects everything I do which causes me stress. Finding a few extra minutes is not easy so when I find them it is a blessing and I want to make the most of them. So this a.m. the class I attend on Friday a.m.s was cancelled. I have a 40 min. drive each way to get there. I now have an extra 2 hours and 20 min. in my morning! I already have the barn cleaned, the hay thrown down from the hay mow to the stalls (enough for the next week!), was able to work with grooming the foster horses a little bit, another row of snow and ice chipped off my patio/deck area and my weekly blog post written (one of my goals is to write more often) and now I have the hot tub open and running waiting for me to finish this post as a special treat for myself (it is a “balmy” 30 degrees out today but no wind and the tub is well over one hundred degrees). Wow I feel great and it is only 10 a.m.!!

So where can you find some “stolen moments” to catch up on something in your life or do something you really want to? I hope you have success in finding some this week.

The assignment for a blogging class I am taking through lvsonline.com was to write a story using 6 words. Since my husband had a heart attack last month this has obviously been on my mind a lot of the time thus the above title. He has not had a cigarette in 6 weeks now and because we are in an area with lots of good medical care he is alive and well today. It was just a matter of choosing which hospital to have the ambulance take him to at which cardiologists immediately saw him and performed a cardiac cath hours later with another one done 10 days ago. Now it is up to him to follow through on no cigarettes, diet changes, taking his many medications and going to cardiac rehab. At this point I feel fairly confident he will succeed and make a full recovery.

Wishing all my readers a very Merry Christmas! My daughter and I are enjoying a warm Christmas with family in Florida while my poor husband holds down the fort in WI coping with snow, freezing rain, ice and now rain on the farm since we left. We really appreciate the opportunity to be with my family and are fortunate he is doing well enough to take care of things on the home front so we could come here.

Two days in a row now I’ve been able to slip a halter on Spice.
I tie it loosely then just let it slip back off. I have not put a rope on the halter yet and I put no pressure on it. I just give her a couple of treats then let it slip off again. I also was able to comb my fingers through her mane yesterday, also a first. Sugar remains very wary although I did touch her face briefly with the halter a couple of times.

A couple of Pat Parelli quotes help me remember that patience is a virtue with these girls and to stick with my slow approach. Pat says “Take the time it takes so it takes less time.” and “prior and proper preparation prevents poor performance particularly if polite and passive persistence is practiced in the proper position.”

Sugar and Spice are progressing well and are looking for the right home(s) that would continue to provide a patient, nurturing atmosphere. In return they have much to offer. I picture them being trained to pull a cart in time. If you are interested in adopting one or both please contact Spirit Horse Equine Rescue. There would be much support available to help you continue working with them.

As a homework assignment for a blogging class I read this article. “What is like breathing to you?” was the question put to the readers of Terry’s blog.

Breathing for me is my farm, my animals, my life in the country, riding my horse…….in the past 5 or 6 weeks I’ve had two really bad days at work. I’ve left being very upset. When I’ve left work upset I fight the city traffic and as I drive I fight to breathe. I just want to get away as quickly as possible. The minutes of my 18 mile commute put space between me and work and as I get closer to my farm I start to be able to take deeper breaths. I think to myself I’m almost home, I’ll be okay, I can relax and breathe again. I feel the tension in my shoulders start to fade. I turn onto my road and my breathing is easier, the tears are gone. I see my horses and mini donkeys in the pasture and work becomes a distant memory. I feel my blood pressure going down. I go to the fence and rub my horse’s neck and feel his warm breath on my face, I’m home…….I can breathe, I am at peace.

If I knew then, what I know now… is the topic for the LVS On-line Blog Carnival. There are always some things a person would like to change in their life. Sometimes you still can change the path you’re on, other times you can only move forward onto a different path.

When I saw the topic for the Blog Carnival a couple of things that I might have done differently in life came to mind.

First of all I would have gone to vet school instead of nursing school It is too hard to go back now after all these years as a nurse (33), being towards the top of the pay range, having seniority and established bills that need to be paid. I tried at one point — started taking some classes that I would need in addition to those I was given credit for from my BSN — but with a young daughter, debts, a job, and pending back surgery it just didn’t feel right. I’m okay with my chosen profession but I know I would have also loved being a vet and if I had another chance I wouldn’t let people talk me out of it.

The second thing that comes to mind as something I might have done differently had I known what was ahead was adopting our daughter. We do love her, but as a special needs child and now a special needs adult we will always be responsible for her which continues to put stress on my husband and I. I truly had no idea what was involved raising a special needs child. I would have talked to parents of special needs kids and adults and found out more about what we were getting in to. I never thought ahead to what would happen once she was grown up or that we might always be responsible for her. I didn’t realize we would have to be much more involved in her adult life than an average parent would be for their child once they were old enough to move out. I also did not anticipate the economy worsening causing budget cuts which have affected the hours staff can help with her needs, the job support she receives and the cuts to all of the programs she needs to enable her to live as independently as possible. Some will say I am horrible for thinking/writing this but I sometimes wonder if it might have been better to be childless. I remain committed to making sure she gets what she needs but sometimes this is a path it would be nice to jump off of!

Other things I wish I had known to do “then”:
When my grandparents were still alive I wish I had written down some of their stories about family and life when they were younger.
I wish I had labeled old photos with dates and names/places.
I wish I had made some different financial decisions.
And finally, I should have thrown out boxes and boxes of stuff when we moved 4 years ago; stuff that now sits in the garage. THAT is a path I can still change so once the weather warms up spring cleaning the garage is in our future!

My beautiful first champion Labrador Retriever and foundation of my breeding program, Champion Honorbright Legend of DMarsh TD, JH, RN, WC (Nessie to her friends) turned 14 years old today. She is the queen of the house and still very dignified. She does not have any major health problems — okay an accident in the kitchen on a day I am gone to work all day at times but that is very forgiveable. I think she enjoys her near deafness. She is also trained on hand signals as are most of my dogs but she chooses to ignore them when it is convenient. As she mosies off to sniff something else in the yard she conveniently looks away as I signal her to come! I am so happy to still have her with us.

Finally it is March and the light at the end of the long winter tunnel…….I was still suffering from “post traumatic stress” from last winter when the first winter storm arrived in November so this winter has seemed to go on forever but it’s March and that means SPRING!! The temperature doesn’t say “spring” this weekend with highs way below normal but at least it is light longer and the view isn’t all snow. The barnyard/outside agility area is a skating ring though courtesy of rain, melting snow then below freezing temps a couple of days ago so hard to picture the equipment up and classes running yet despite the inquiries.

The donkeys would not leave the barn the morning after the rain turned to ice. They are cautious and smart enough to know it is dangerous. It took Kent almost a half hour to convince them to go into a pasture and it wasn’t the one he wanted them to go into! Even the horses are treading quite carefully on the ice which I’m glad to see.

But it’s March so we can hopefully look forward to some better weather. In the meantime I’m going to Disneyland (World) and hoping when I get back winter will have left Wisconsin. In the meantime I plan to soak up enough Florida sun to last me until May!!!